United Synagogue Youth’s (USY) recent decision to amend the language in its constitution concerning interfaith dating for its teen leaders has Conservative rabbis and movement members debating the implications of the move.
Late last month, 750 teens came to Atlanta for the USY international convention, and the Conservative youth movement’s board voted to adopt a number of new amendments, including a controversial change to the wording of its interdating policy.
“They had a standard for leadership that used to say USY leaders should refrain from dating that might be construed as interdating,” said Rabbi Steven Wernick, CEO of the United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism.
“The new language says that USY leaders should strive to make healthy Jewish dating choices, including the recognition of the importance of dating Jews and treating all people Betzelem Elokim, in the image of God… The old ruling was ‘thou shalt not,’ and the new ruling is ‘thou shall.’”
Rabbi Wernick explained that the amendments were drafted by USY teens who have been working on it for nearly a year, seeking guidance from sources ranging from their peers to prominent rabbis.
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“They processed the input, talked about the pros and cons, and ran an excellent meeting,” Rabbi Wernick said.
“There were 42 present for the final discussion and vote, but the standards affect less than 100 kids. They affect the kids who wish to become regional officers or international officers or board members… It was a true constitutional process. This is all about the teens wrestling with… how to connect traditions to their awareness of their realities. That’s what this was about.”
He said to the best of his knowledge, the former interdating clause had never been enforced to the point of having to dismiss any USY leaders on the grounds that they were dating a non-Jew.
“But I do know that people were discouraged from running for office if they couldn’t commit to that, and I can tell you that we are going to continue to review with those who wish to run for regional or national office that these are the standards USY has set for themselves and we want people to understand them and acknowledge them and commit [to the idea] that if they are going to be a leader, this is what they are going to do,” Rabbi Wernick said.
Rabbi Stephen Schwarzman, spiritual leader of Shaar Shalom Synagogue in Thornhill, Ont., which is home to a USY chapter, said he doesn’t think the change in the wording of the policy will have a serious effect on the movement as a whole.
“I think it’s an effort to be in step with the times, and when I say that, I don’t mean it negatively, I mean it positively. The previous language was negative, and they replaced it with positive language,” said the American-born Rabbi Schwarzman, who came to Toronto last year after serving congregations in Maine and Massachusetts.
“I know as a rabbi… especially in the U.S. – less so here in Canada – there are not a whole lot of conversations you can have that begin with the language of [what’s] forbidden… What you have to do as a rabbi is recognize that we live in an open… society. No one is required to be Jewish anymore. Those who choose to be Jewish need to be motivated and inspired, and I think that their decision to go from negative language to positive language is probably part of that,” he said.
“I do appreciate how different Canadian Jewry is from American Jewry. We speak the same language, and for all intents and purposes, we look and sound the same, but things here really are different… There is an intensity and involvement in the Canadian community that I’ve seen so far, and the American community would do very well if they could emulate it.”
The spiritual leader of Toronto’s Beth Tikvah Synagogue, Rabbi Jarrod Grover, is not as forgiving.
“I think this shows a weakening of the movement’s principles… and I am appalled about what happened,” Rabbi Grover said.
“Remember that a week before [USY voted to amend its policy], there was a big controversy in the movement because a rabbi at a prominent Conservative synagogue in Boston suggested that he would be conducting interfaith marriages. So in the midst of this, to come out with softer language is part of the struggle of the movement, which is dying in the States,” he said.
Rabbi Grover added that the movement is struggling to find a balance between adhering to its religious principles and becoming as welcoming as possible.
“I think that this move on the part of USY – again it affects hardly any people – it is not going to have any real impact, but it sends a message about the direction of the movement’s leadership – that they are afraid to state what they are about and what they are not about,” he said.
“Everyone says it is not a real change, it doesn’t say anything, it’s just language. Then why would you do it? You’re doing it because you’re afraid to say what you disagree with. Because to draw a line is to exclude people, and what it so bad about excluding people? I think it is important that the movement knows what it believes in, as it should know what it does not believe in, and that’s the problem. That we are afraid to say what we do not believe in.”