It is said that giving tzedakah will bring peace. Perhaps what this means is that the development of compassion and our recognition of those outside of us brings us to a point of great empathy. Peace can only be achieved through this and lead us to a place where we will do unto others, as we would have them do unto us.

A while back, I was conversing with friends of mine, Lianne and Bruce Leboff, about parenting and tzedakah. I have known Lianne since the early 1990s when we worked at the United Jewish Appeal (UJA). Bruce has volunteered extensively with UJA and the Jewish Community Centre on the allocations side. Between the two of them, they are adept at the mechanics of raising money and distributing it. The Leboffs are very caring people and give a lot to the world through chesed.

 The couple told me about a refreshing tzedakah allocations process they designed and shared with their three children – Danielle, Rachel and Stephanie. Danielle and Rachel are in Grade 6 and Stephanie is in Grade 5 – all at United Synagogue Day School.

 Bruce and Lianne sat with their family and said, “Guys, here is $1,000 for you to give to tzedakah.” They explained to them that many people give tzedakah emotionally, to one or a few organizations that touch them, and others wait until somebody knocks at their door.

 “What we would like you to do,” the parents said, “is think about which needs in our world are most important, the organizations worthy of receiving your fund, and how you will divide up the $1,000.” They handed their children a sheet of paper with a list of numerous organizations dealing with Jewish and international issues and a list of questions they should ask each other, including how much money should go to Jewish causes versus non-Jewish ones.

 Danielle, Rachel and Stephanie then set about talking and figuring out which charities would end up on their giving list. They huddled together as a conscientious allocations committee and debated, argued, discussed and ultimately determined where their tzedakah funds would go.

  I learned their ultimate decision was very wise and ensured the greatest needs were taken care of first. The Leboffs asked that I not include the name of the recipient organizations, but did say the list included non-profits helping the Jewish people, Israel, the non-Jewish world and the animal world.

It is interesting to me that young people, given the opportunity, respect and direction, will often arrive at the same outcome as a table full of adults with degrees, staff support and years of experience behind them.

Once the allocations process was complete, the family sent a letter to each recipient charity with a cheque and a letter stating how the Leboff clan had decided on giving money to them. The reactions, according to Lianne and Bruce, were positive, and Danielle, Rachel and Stephanie felt “quite engaged by the process and the responses,” Lianne and Bruce said.

I asked Bruce, the vice-president of risk management at Gluskin Sheff & Associates, what compelled the couple to implement this idea. He replied, “Many of my clients have added their older children to their charitable foundation committee, but we decided to do it earlier. Why wait until they are older?”

Teaching acts of kindness, like giving tzedakah, is paramount in child-rearing.  Consider the creation of an allocation committee within your household and then pass this idea on far and wide. Soon we may all be privy to a world at peace. Yasher koach, Leboffs! Great idea.

[email protected]   Sderot/Sudan?