The only reasons that take me to the Western Wall in Jerusalem are visitors to the city and the occasional bar or bat mitzvah, which, despite reservations about the venue, I attend in order to honour friends. Unlike some Jews who insist that the place inspires them to devotion, it doesn’t move me to prayer.

Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel taught that Judaism doesn’t have holy places, only holy events. Moreover, those who abuse the Wall – e.g., by restricting women – in the guise of piety should be shunned,  for religious reasons.

But I made an exception one evening last month when my grandson was being sworn in at an Israel Defence Forces ceremony there. As a new conscript, he pledged his allegiance to his country and received a gun, which we pray he’ll never have to use, and a Tanach, which we hope will inspire and guide him in the course of his service and beyond.

On one level, the ceremony was corny. It consisted of several standard patriotic speeches with many references to Scripture, especially to Joshua’s conquest of the land. The very fact of holding the event at the Wall is also problematic, for it gives the impression of turning military necessity into a religious imperative. Had I chosen the texts, they’d come from the Prophets urging us to divine service and national self-scrutiny.

But the speakers did make some reference to the pursuit of peace and to what Israelis call “the purity of arms.” Despite the military drill, the recruits weren’t being primed to become indiscriminate killers but, rather, thoughtful and proud defenders of their people. This was no nationalist rally, but a sombre moment reflecting the realities of life in Israel.

Though we were spared the usual clichés about the Holocaust, my wife and I couldn’t help but think of it. As children, we witnessed the Shoah, she in the ghetto of Lodz and the concentration camp of Ravensbruck, I at a somewhat safer distance in various parts of the Soviet Union. We well remember what it was like when Jews weren’t able to defend themselves. The only reason why they’d be brought to parade grounds was to be selected for extermination.  

As critical as I am of many aspects of the politics of the current government of Israel, I also know that had there been no Jewish state, our people might by now be on its way to becoming quaint exhibits in museums. Even though I believe that this government has been elected foolishly, I know that it was done freely and democratically, and that that’s unique to this part of the world.

To have grandchildren who are partners in shaping and maintaining Jewish sovereignty fills me with pride and gratitude. Their parents have imbued them with a sense of love for the country and taught them their duty to treat all human beings, including adversaries, as God’s creatures. As critical champions of democracy, they’re loyal Israelis who espouse at times unpopular causes for peace, justice and coexistence.

It’s a balance that’s difficult to keep, and few of us get it right. We tend to veer either to too much particularism with insufficient regard for others, especially the minorities in Israel itself, or to too much universalism, which sometimes may obscure a commitment to our own. Trying to root ourselves in tradition, we select from it to suit our prejudices.

Jews in the Diaspora, perhaps because they’re on the sidelines, are prone to be attracted to extremes. Many blindly toe party lines and mouth slogans that deliberately distort the opposite point of view. As exciting as it is to feel a part of Israel, it’s very easy to get the situation wrong from whatever angle you try to assess it, even if it’s in an ostensible effort to support the Jewish state and to find your own role in its defence.

Most of the civilians present at the ceremony were parents and relatives. Tourists from abroad, especially non-Jews, who might have found themselves there at the time might be forgiven for being repulsed by the seeming militarism. But if they know at least something about Jews and their history, they might reflect on the alternatives and ask themselves if they would have accepted for themselves the threat of their own extinction just for the sake of being considered by the rest of the world to be good guys and noble victims.